Tuesday, 6 March 2012

It's March already!! :-)

Well, I can't really believe that it's March already!
The days are getting lighter for longer & Spring appears to be on it's way!
So do the seasons affect you?
I think psychologically they do. But for me the climate changes do too.
My problem is that both ends of the spectrum affect my pain issues! Extreme cold but also extreme heat! And when I say extreme, actually it doesn't really have to be that extreme!
For me, because pain is one of my main symptoms, that's the one I notice it on most but I was wondering about my other symptoms too. And I guess the seasons do make a difference but not enough that I really notice it.
The fatigue is there all year round, although I have to say that the medication my consultant prescribed for me last September really is making a difference with that symptom.
He prescribed Modafinil 200mg for me. I generally only take one a day. And I have to admit it does keep me awake longer.
When he gave it to me he did say that they don't work for everyone. Knowing my track record with medications not working for me, I wasn't sure whether it would work or not, but in this case I can happily say that I have found something that works!
And it feels good to have something that helps!!
I try not to take it any later than 2pm though because otherwise I'm awake all night!!
I'm really glad that I have found this help because it will really help when we go on holiday! Which is now only 9 weeks away!!

The start to my year has been mixed!
I've had the issues with my opiate withdrawal, which I'm still going through.
I'm still waiting to go into hospital to complete the withdrawal & sort out this medication.
It's been so frustrating. If I'd known when I started this what I know now, would I have agreed to do this? I'm not sure?
I'd like to think I would have because although it's taken a lot longer than it should have, the reason behind doing it remains the same. To get me off this opiate & to assess whether it's been helping me or not. And if I have to go back on it, to be on it at a lower and more manageable dose will have made all this pain & frustration worth it!
Please remind me I said that when I'm going through the final withdrawal!

So that's been the difficult bit but the positives of the start of the year have been my ability to focus on other things.
I'm really proud of myself because I knew we had four months before Martin's 40thparty & then going on holiday and I really wanted to try to lose weight for those events.
It would have been really easy for me to use the pain I've been going through as an excuse for me not to eat healthily.........& believe me, I don't need much of an excuse to turn to chocolate!!
But I have a load of clothes that I want to be able to wear on holiday & I had a time limit, so my determination kicked in!!
Having the party & the holiday to focus on have been a god send! I really believe that if I hadn't had those things to look forward to, that I would have been on a slippery slope to burying my head in the sand with my moods & possible depression.
It has really proved to me how important it is for us to have things to focus on & look forward to. It doesn't work for everyone but it works for us!
So far I have lost just under 20 pounds! :-) We've got nine weeks to go so hopefully I'll get a bit further yet!
But I have discovered one thorn in my side! Tysabri!
It appears that after the last two infusions I haven't lost anything. And both times it's been directly after my infusion! So I'm altering my goals slightly so that I'm not too disappointed when I don't get as far as I want to with my weight loss!

The other thing that I have been doing is swimming.
I have always enjoyed swimming and it is something that I used to be fairly good at. So being diagnosed with MS put a stop to it for a while. I lost my confidence and even though a Physiotherapist took me once, I still didn't carry on with it, because I didn't trust myself and the sensation of the water on my skin was really difficult to deal with.
We are really lucky now though as we have a friend who has a pool that we are able to use. We are in a position to go when no-one else is there and that has given me the chance to find out what I can and can't do.
I can't use my legs properly at all and that is frustrating but I can still use my arms, so I have been able to build on my confidence and do some exercise.
I'm hoping that I'll be able to get a physiotherapist to come with me soon to help me with some exercises and show me how to strengthen my legs.
It's a really positive thing though, to be doing something that I enjoy but will also hopefully be helping to keep me mobile.
It feels really good & I hope to keep doing this for some time!

I hope everyone is keeping positive and looking forward to a brighter Spring and Summer!
Love & hugs

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