Friday, 6 March 2009

Not a good day :(

It wasn't a good day today. 
I can't quite put my finger on why, but I was very tired and had a lot of pain. 
I also had an issue with my pain relief patch. It was due to be changed today. It has to be done at the same time and the same day each week. I did it just before I started work, which has been fine for the past three weeks. But today after I had put the new one on, I came over feeling dizzy. Almost like I was going to pass out, although that is something that I have never done. 
I decided to try work as I was already at the store anyway. With hindsight, of course, I think it probably wasn't such a clever idea, but I needed to at least try. I managed to stay on the checkout for a couple of hours, which was quite an achievement. But I was feeling worse as the time went on. I asked if I could get off the checkout, which I did. I was accompanied upstairs by a colleague, who wanted to make sure I didn't pass out on the way - Thanks Eileen! After sitting down for five minutes, I decided that I couldn't face going back down again, so I asked if I could go home. That was fine and as Martin was picking me up anyway, I didn't have to wait long before he arrived. 
Once I got home, I got straight into my PJ's. There is nothing like settling down in your PJ's, knowing you haven't got to go anywhere else for the rest of the day!! I find it very comforting!!
I started to feel a little better, I guess the pressure I was putting myself under, trying to work, really didn't help.  You see, I know that now, and I can be quite honest about it now, but at the time, it is like a switch that goes off inside me, saying, I must at least try and work now that I am here! I'm not sure that it is such a bad ethic really!!
Anyway, it's work again tomorrow and rehearsals on Sunday, so I am going to bed soon. I'm ever hopeful for that full night's sleep where I wake up totally refreshed - I can dream can't I?!

PS: Hi Emma! You see a special mention just for you!! 


  1. I hope you slept well. Be kind to yourself.
    You are a real fighter- Devonian people are known for that I believe and I admire your spirit. I saw Herrad fight a lot of things she could not beat but had to fight. Fighting can be better than giving in and letting it roll you over but try to make it easy on your self.
    Have a good Saturday
    PS Clement Freud talking about getting older but I guess it goes for MS "She said 'lets run up stairs and make love'- I said 'at my age darling it is one or the other!'"

  2. Richie,
    I love the Clement Freud quote, how true!!
    I will try to be kind to myself, but that means thinking about me and I have a problem doing that! As I said in a previous post, having MS means that you have to put yourself first, but again that is a trait that I am not that familiar with!
    I am off to work again soon, but I have to say that the thought of work does not appeal to me today. I will think about your advice though and try and be kind to myself - it might include chocolate!!
    Have a good weekend,
    Love to you and Herrad

    Amelia XxXxX

  3. Hi Amewlia,

    Hope you are not in so much pain today and work is going well.

    Think chocolate is a very important element of a good day.

    I make sure I eat a bit everyday,

    Enjoy your saturday evening and sunday with your darling.